There are men. Then there are tough men like Bond—James Bond, Jean-Claude Van Damme, and Sylvester Stallone–the men you don’t see in romantic comedies or showing sappy feelings. They’re too busy kickin’ butt and taking names. However, we’re pretty sure that they’d show a lot of feelings, probably even tear up if they realized that they were missing out on one of manhood’s greatest achievements yet. We’re not talking about the wheel, or fire, but rather Modere Men’s Line.
Modere Men’s Line is exactly what those men, and every above-average male, needs in their life. Complete with the stuff you need and not any unnecessary fluff, this line includes shampoo, body wash, shaving cream, post-shave balm, and styling cream.
- Shampoo: Washes away grease, but preps your hair for her finger nails. It also reduces hair loss, so keep it away from your chest hairs. Conditions your scalp, so you’re not literally hard-headed, unless of course it comes to important things like…bacon.
- Body Wash: There are only a few things you allow to touch your body: choice females and your impeccable clothes. This body wash needs to be one of the few chosen ones that can touch your man-hide. With foam boosters like coconut salts and hydrolyzed jojoba esters to condition your skin you’ll be thinking of ways to get dirty so you can shower yet again.
- Shave Cream: Leave the beards for the guys who need to cover up their face. Not that you, Mr. Chiseled Chin, ever nick yourself, or even feel pain if you do—but you want your shave to be as pleasant as possible. We’ve enslaved soothing ginger and oat bran extract and put it to work so that it can help with irritation and smooth out wrinkles.
- Post-Shave Balm: If you were to find the cleanest, purest mountain stream and stick your face in it, then it’d be almost as refreshing as this post-shave balm, without the hassle of having to scale a mountain (not that it’d be hard for you, but who’s got the time?). Besides relaxing your skin with aloe, scutellaria baicalensis root extract has been shown to be an inhibitor of tyrosinase (nerd talk for anti-aging properties).
- Styling Cream: Once a female finally stops gazing at your rippling muscles or getting lost in your steely gaze she’ll notice your man-locks. Be prepared for whenever that time finally comes by smoothing your look in place with Styling Cream. Crambe seed oil helps strengthen hair fibers while carnauba wax keeps a firm hold of your hair, so you’re free to hold onto her.
As you can see, it’s imperative somebody find out who their agents are because we’d hate to see the damage they’ll inflict if they feel like they’re the last to know.